Contributions?
Dear World,
Contributions to the stylecrusader are very welcome. If you've spotted someone that you think should grace the pages of this blog please take their photo and send it in. You can add your own caption if you would like, or leave it for me to do if you would rather. Please make sure these are your own photos though, we don't want to rip off others hard work of capturing the badly dressed. E-mail your thoughts and photos to: thestylecrusader@googlemail.com
Keep the light on when getting dressed...
The Verdict
We all know asians can be super stylish and cool, even if I don't always get what they are going for (they can wear some weird stuff). But even if I'm culturally retarded it can work and I'm impressed.
However, this man here has got it all wrong: matching orange nylon sports top (what is it even supposed to be... in no way is it stylish or even practical, unless his goal is to get really sweaty) with orange floral board shorts, is a delta force assault on the eyes. It is then topped off with a straw hat which is too small and some leather sandals.
It screams tourist... which he probably is. But just because you are on holiday does not mean you have to dig out all items of clothing you haven't worn in the past ten years and select your outfit at random while standing in a dark room.
Redemption?
The shoes would be okay with another outfit, perhaps some light coloured kahki tousers and just a plain t-shirt.
The hat might be okay if chosen with a checked shirt... maybe go for a cowboy theme? Everyone likes a cowboy, right? Or perhaps also with the aforementioned khakis and t-shirt.
The shorts would be great if you were going swimming... in hawaii... and it was dark.
And finally... there is no redemption for the shirt unless you had to wear it for some sporting event because that is what your team wears. But I would hide it as soon as I got home.
p.s. this is the first reader submission.
Too much of a good thing...
The Verdict
Ok, lets be honest - this is all a bit too much. The colour is really nice, but it's too much. Anyway, when was it even made? Do people wear skirt suits with long jackets like that anymore? Obviously they do - but really they shouldn't. The shape is all wrong - it's very unflattering. Plus the shoes don't go - strappy red leather platform sandals? Red leather rarely works and cheap red leather never works. So the matching shoe-bag-combo is just making the outfit more dated.
Redemption?
Have a tailor chop off half of that jacket. If it sat to her waist it might be more bearable. The collar is a bit big for it though - is it supposed to be outerwear? The more I look at it the more confused I get. Is she going to a wedding perhaps...? This was taken on a Saturday so it's doubtful that she's wearing this to the office. Anyway - either get rid of half the jacket or get rid of the whole thing. A neutral coloured fitted jacket would work a treat and balance out the loudness of the skirt. Also, a more tailored shoe would be more appropriate with the pencil skirt. If she wants to keep the 'funky look' she is obviously going for with the outlandish colour choices she can keep the red bag... or better yet get rid of the bag and just maybe opt for a funky pair of earings or necklace. Sort it out woman - this is wrong for a lot of reasons.
Staples
Every once in a while something really great comes along. It might originally be snubbed as a weak and passing trend but somehow it manages to stick. Two such examples:
1. Leggings
2. Check shirts
Many tried to fight these trends, but they are impossible to avoid. This couple is very cute and they are sporting a look that is rocked by probably half the population aged 16-27 each day. Even if it's over done it's great. What did we wear before these things came along?
Spotted: Americans on the Tube
Only Americans wear shoes like this. Only Americans wear them with socks. Only Americans buy matching pairs with their son to wear on holiday in England. And only Americans also get matching khaki cargo shorts to wear with them.
p.s. dad don't be sad - i know you have similar shoes but you can pull them off!
Autumn/Winter Coverup
I just ordered this 'Wool Harbour Peacoat' today off J.Crew. I am very excited because not only is it very cute it is also going to be so practical because I got it with thinsulate so it will be extra warm (I hope that is not going to make it super bulky?) for all those early morning trips into London in the freezing cold. Can't wait to receive it!
Only in England...
The Verdict
Very bad. These 16 year old girls look like they are seriously up to no good, and this was taken at 6pm on a Monday. I dread to think what they look like at 11pm on a Saturday. Too short, too skimpy, too high, too ratty... too much of all the wrong things, and not enough of the right ones.
Redemption?
Girls, have a little sense of self worth. You don't need to dress like this to get attention. Brush your hair, put on some flats, you've got your whole life to wear high heels... save 'em for a time more appropriate than a monday evening at burger king - after all, I can't imagine any other place that will be letting you through their front door. Oh, and if its warm enough to wear a strappy top than don't wear tights (especially not 'nude' coloured ones that don't match your skin tone - but that's a no-no at any age).
Parents, get a clue about what your kids are wearing out. This is not okay.
Big girls, you are beautiful...
The Verdict
Dressing to suit your shape - it's not always an easy task. However, a couple simple things to remember: wearing white on your largest part will only draw attention to that area, and having a sharp line cut across right above your largest part will also only draw further attention.
The combination of a dark waistcoat and leggings is leaving her with what appears to be a larger than life white tube around her hips.
Redemption?
This girl has got some style. I like the look she is going for (in fact, I am also after a waistcoat, and would probably wear it in a similar way).
She's not a lost cause... she's just not aware, or doesn't care, about what suits her shape. If she does, I'd advise she get a longer waistcoat that sits to her hip. If she doesn't, that's cool too. Not everyone is bothered about wearing things that compliment their shape. And, in the words of Mika...
Bag lady?
The Verdict
There is just too much going on here: massive scrunchie, scarf, polka dots, block neon colours, harem pants, gladiator sandals.
Redemption?
Lower the amount of trends you are trying to cover. Pick one, maybe two, to try to incorporate into your look. Otherwise you run the risk of looking like a hot mess.
Oh Alexa... Why must you torment me so?
I am after a Mulberry Shimmy bag.
I just came across this photo of a certain someone with one... when I get mine I am going to recreate this little magical black cab moment.
Her boyfriend's shirt?
The Verdict
I get it. She's trying to do the whole 'I just fell out of bed and borrowed my boyfriend's shirt look'. Okay, fine. But basically it just looks like she's got on a massive shirt, some tiny shorts and some high heels - on Sunday afternoon. So really, it turns out looking more like a very late version of the walk of shame.
Redemption?
A. Take off those heels. Heels with shorts rarely work, especially during the day. Where is she going anyway, it's Sunday afternoon for goodness sake. Put on some flats.
B. Put your own clothes on. It's acceptable while at home, but if your going to leave the house take off his shirt and put your own on.
C. Keep the shirt but put on some skinny jeans. That might look cute, and a little less faux-street walker crossed with a lecturer.
Who wears short shorts?
The Verdict
These shorts are seriously too short.
And, that colour combination is not working either.
Redemption?
At least she isn't wearing heels - she got that much right at least. She's not 14 and she's not a model therefore the very bare minimum 3 inch rule must dictate her relationship with shorts - If the inseam is less than 3 inches: avoid.
Sock head?
The Verdict
I'm not really sure what this sock-like device is doing on this man's head. It's not for warmth, because it was a very hot day. Does it have a purpose, or is it a 'fashion' statement?
Redemption?
None. Take that sock off your head.